


The Poison Arrow

by Butterflyfish



Series: Getting to know Daryl Dixon. [6]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-02
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-17 20:19:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 16,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5884144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"While the Cat's away, the mice will play"<br/>Or try to.</p><p>Someone is trying to drive a wedge, and force a hand. </p><p>We catch up with Abra and Daryl and the group in Alexandria several years on. Where things have been going far too smoothly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title subject to change

I twiddled the ring on my finger. Around and around and around, boring a deep line in my skin.

I'd been wearing it for five years now, and I always fiddled with it when Daryl was away. Today was even worse. He'd taken Charlie, too. He and I had argued about it, and even Charlie wasn't sure at first.

"But we c'n eat the pigs n the chickens, Daddy, I don' hafta eat a Squirl" he'd said to Daryl, in his cute little southern accent. Daryl had picked him up and spoken to him quietly.

"Well, sometimes we might be outside n not come home fera long time, then we have to, squirrels n rabbits n deer, fish, berries. Remember?" Charlie nodded solemnly. We had made sure he knew about the world outside the walls.

"I don't like it" I said as Daryl put Charlie down again. I ruffled his sandy hair, far too long, but it made him look so much like Daryl I couldn't bring myself to cut it. Daryl looked at me, nodded his single barely there nod and replied

"I know, but he's gotta learn." I knelt down to Charlie's level and eyed him very seriously.

"Ok, buddy, what must you do?" He thought a moment and said

"I gotta be a _goot_ boy, n do what Daddy says" his little blue eyes sparkled and he added "I be'd goot, Mama. I always be'd goot" I smiled at him and kissed his little chubby cheek hard, pulling him into me. He squirmed, because he liked to think he was a _big_ boy when Daryl was around. If we had been alone he'd have hugged me back just as hard.

I stood and looked at Daryl

"Be careful" I warned "Bring him home in one piece" Daryl looked at me like I was insane,

"Abra." I nodded, relenting. "We'll be home in a couple days, we're not goin' far."

And just like that, my two favourite men left on a hunting trip.

"I used to love it when Ed went hunting" Carol said behind me, making me jump out of my skin. "All summer I waited for October, and for him to be gone for a week, maybe two, and it was just me and Sophia" She smiled wistfully. "Mind you," she said focussing again "Ed was no Daryl." I narrowed my eyes at her, then laughed. The old joke between us designed to wind up Daryl, who had thought I was jealous of his friendship with the older woman. "He'll bring him home" she said, then. "You really shouldn't worry" I knew that, of course he would bring him home.

But what is a mother if not a worrier?

 

So there I sat, on the couch, staring at the ever blank screen of the TV, and twiddled that ring around my finger. Worrying about Daryl and Charlie, and seriously considering a lock on the door.

We'd been given our own house, Rick had apparently pulled Daryl up about the 'animal noises' Judith had been hearing at night, and the blatantly large amount of loud sex keeping everyone else awake, Daryl assured me it was said with a smile, though it was never mentioned in my presence, oddly. Hence, we got our own home, and because Charlie slept, well, like the dead, we could make all the noise we wanted.

So we did.

But we all congregated in the same places, we mostly all ate together, and the doors were always unlocked. At times it was like a very annoying, nosey, neighbourhood. Often times I'd come out of the shower, dressed in nothing but a towel, to find Glenn and Maggie or Carl and Judith on the couch.

Luckily I had the sense to put on a towel. Most of the time. But there's always that one exception that makes the rule.

There was once when Charlie had been napping, and Daryl had been away a few days, when I forgot to even take a towel into the bathroom. I found myself on the landing, facing Rick, who had let himself in the front door. No knock, no shouting hello. He just stood, waiting for me to breeze by so he could ask me to swap my shift on the farm.

I'd forgotten I was naked for a second, coming out of the bathroom, seeing him, until his eyes ran up and down my body. He didn't even appear embarrassed, and only turned his face away when I realised, and dashed in to the bedroom.

* * *

The first thing I had ever shown Charlie was trackin'. I'd been out and found some easy to find rabbit n small game activity. He was only six, but if he was at all a Dixon, this shoulda been easy for him. We'd gone over it all a coupla times already.

"We lookin' for daddy?" He asked, copying my pose, eyes down, I crouched close to the ground, n so did he.

"Well, we're gonna do some trackin', Charlie, you remember what that means?" He thought on it for a long few seconds, then looked at me with wide open blue eyes.

"We're gonna find somethin'" It wasn't even a question. I grabbed him, and stood him directly in front of me. "Tell me everythin' you see, Charlie, n everythin' you hear. You gotta be observant"

"Wha'sat mean daddy?"

"Observant? Means you have to see everythin' round ya, all the time. Ya have to listen real hard. Then, when somethin's wrong or different, you know. N Sometimes you have to remember everythin' you saw, too, cause you might have to get home from the middle nowhere" He looked up at me, his face worried and pale. "What's wrong Charlie, ya hear something?" He shook his little head.

"C'n we go, I don't like it here" I crouched down next to him and asked him why "It's too quiet, I can't hear the birds no more" he whispered, he was right.

"Well, we can't just go, we have to think why the birds might be quiet" The area was safe, there was just a little weather comin' in. 

"They're ascairt" he said "I don't like it" I nodded at him. 

"It's ok to be scared, buddy, but you can't just run, you have to think really hard before you just run away, why do you think the birds are scared? Is it us? Or somethin' else?" Charlie looked up into the sky and pointed. I followed his finger and saw the huge black cloud over head, blacker'n night. "Could be. Good job. Now, what else do you see?"

We followed a track a rabbit had left almost right to the run. I asked him what we could do now we knew where the rabbits lived.

"eat them!" He yelled, excited, makin' me laugh. 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

On the second day I was getting dressed when Rick walked in unannounced. Without the shower going I heard him this time, threw a jumper over my half nakedness and went to the top of the stairs.

"Hey," I said "what's up?" He looked furious, and in recent times this was unusual. Things had been going well in Alexandria.

"There's a storm coming" he said, "I need you to help me get the animals in shelter." I jogged down the stairs to him, and he led the way to the farm.

"Chickens need feed" he said, after we'd secured them and the pigs away. "We're gonna have to get some today," he looked up at the sky, scowling like it'd pissed him off.

"Ok, I'm sure Glenn..." He cut me off with a look.

"No, you and me, you're the farm manager" I shook my head at him.

"C'mon Rick, I can't go out without Daryl. If he comes back and I'm not here" he cut me short again.

"We'll be a couple hours. Daryl and Charlie won't be home for a day or two" he put his arm around my shoulders and half hugged me. "He won't even know"

I shrugged out of his grasp and looked at the sky. The clouds were rolling in thick and fast. Daryl and Charlie would have shelter, and a little rain wouldn't bring them home, but I noticed my hair was beginning to fly around my face.

"Wind's picking up" I said, looking sidelong at Rick.

"better make it quick, then" he said with a sly smile I didn't much care for.

He let me run in and get changed, telling me to be quick, and he let people know we were going. Michonne raised her eyebrows at me as I entered the house to let Rick know I was ready, and I shook my head behind Rick's back. You don't argue with Rick, regardless.

We hopped in one of the cars and headed out, Tara, on watch, pulling a face at me as well.

Everyone seemed to know Daryl was bound to go nuts. But I was with Rick, for heaven's sake, I'd be fine. I almost rolled my eyes, but withheld. If Daryl was volatile, Rick was Vesuvius.

"We get in, get the feed, get out" Rick said as we pulled into a large parking lot. "We're gonna have to start growing our own" he smiled at me,

"We can get some seeds sprouting all year If we had a green house, or even a south facing window. Pumpkins are good, we could grow some just for the birds by the compost" I said to him, brain instantly on the run at the idea of easy homegrown produce for the animals. It had been so good to get a real job in Alexandria, I never even dreamed of running a farm, but here I was, collecting chicken feed and making plans and rotas.

"C'mon, we'll get this over with" Rick said, checking the coast was clear.

The food was in a pet shop, and it seemed an easy run. Rick got out, and out of habit I waited for the all clear that Daryl always gave me, but Rick was already gone.

"Shit" I said, hopping out of the car and chasing him down.

"Ok?" He asked. We'd not been on a run just us. I nodded at him.

"Yeah, sorry, me and Daryl have a set routine". Rick cocked his head to one side a little.

"Well, maybe you need to run with the rest of us more often. Need you to be able to look out for any of us in a pinch" He banged on the door and I drew my hunting knife, bouncing from foot to foot. He watched me with interest, waiting patiently for the walkers to come.

"What?" I asked him, confused by the attention he was giving me. He shrugged, standing away from the wall he was leaning against.

"You used to dance?" He asked, I guessed he was referring to 'before' and nodded.

"Kinda" I replied, as the assholes inside finally made themselves known, scratching at the glass in the door. I nodded at them and Rick told me he'd let them out, one by one.

I felt this was some kind of initiation. Like maybe Rick thought I was too wrapped in cotton wool by Daryl. Everything we did felt dangerous.  
Maybe I was too used to Daryl looking out for me

One by one the walkers came, and one by one I knocked them down. One grabbed at my clothes, and I had to break its leg to get it to fall dragging me with it, until I landed on top and stabbed it in the forehead.

I looked up at Rick, I was covered in shit and panting heavily. He wore a small smile and beckoned me inside the building. So far he hadn't even broken a sweat.

Inside was disgusting. Cages and glass cases of animal's bones grinned at us as we entered. It was dark, and cold, and smelled like cat pee.  
I grabbed a cart and rolled it over to the chicken feed. We took five bags, each weighing in at 40 pounds. It wasn't much, but it was all they had. On a whim I grabbed a couple 40lb bags of bird seed, the idea forming that we could get them sprouting, and have some nice greens for the chickens, too.  
Rick nodded appreciatively, and we left.

It was an easy run, but I was stunned how Rick didn't get his hands dirty. I'd seen what he could do, I was at terminus, I was at the church.  
I thought, on the drive back, that Rick hadn't really seen me in action. He'd seen me disappear one day and come back scratched, and feverish. He'd seen me go after Daryl when he'd been kidnapped and come back bruised, with broken ribs and broken spirit. Maybe this was a test, was I any good without Daryl.

Why would I need to be, though?

I thought too much, I always had, made too much of the smallest things. We went on a run, I was willing to kick walker ass, so Rick let me.  
However, I think I passed.

 

It was a heavy storm. Maggie, Rick and I watched it from the porch after dinner. Wind blew at a rate of 90 miles per hour and rain seemed to come down sideways.

The horses were kicking their stable doors and neighing, distressed, but all we could was wait it out. Thunder and lightning crashed around us.

As Maggie turned in, I asked her to check on the horses first thing, she agreed and went on her way. I turned to Rick

"So, today was interesting" he nodded, coming up beside me and leaning on the porch railing.

"I guess" I looked at his profile, and turned away from the storm, leaning my butt on the railing instead of my hands.

"You didn't get your hands dirty" I said. He nodded

"Yeah, well, I have my reasons." I folded my arms and faced him, he stood from the railing and squared up to me.

"Be nice to know about that, you know, before you drop me in walker guts. What was that about?" Rick shrugged, and I eyed him suspiciously. When I didn't look away he relented.

"Daryl won't always be around. I won't always be around. Maggie, Glenn, Carl. I need to ensure everyone can look after themselves." I shook my head at him.

"You know, we're OK. You should be teaching Judith. Charlie's out there right now learning precious skills that will help him as an adult." Rick laughed a single huff of humourless sound.

"When it's your own kid," he cocked his head side to side as though stretching, as narrowed his eyes "it's a little different." I gritted my teeth to keep from punching him square in the face.

"Yeah, and I'm sure it is different with Carl." I said evenly. "But we were talking about Judith."

Before he could reply I stormed off into the rain, and to my own home. I'd rather be alone than spoken to like that.


	3. Chapter 3

We'd had a small fenced hut built in the woods for some time. Me n Charlie crashed there, waitin' for the storm to pass. He didn't like the wind, he said it sounded like ghosts, but I told him what I thought about that.

"Ain't no such thing, Charlie, once ya gone, ya gone" He looked at me with his wide innocent eyes and shook his head.

"No daddy, once, ya gone you come back as a monster!" I smiled at him.

"After that though Charlie, once ya gone, ya really are." Charlie sat, eatin' a sandwich from the pack we'd brought with us. I could see he was thinkin'.

"Ya'fta shoot 'em in the head" he said, almost to himself, his little legs kicking in the air above the floor. I put down my own food and cocked my head at him. Sure, Abra n I'd made sure he knew about Walkers, n that the world was a hateful place at times, that strangers really were dangerous, but as far as I knew, we hadn't taught him nothin' 'bout death. Nothin' 'bout how to put down walkers, or the livin' we wanted not to turn. He was six, n that stuff could hopefully wait for years.

"Where'd ya hear that? Who told you they had to be shot in the head?" He turned his face back to me n shrugged, still eatin' contentedly 'nuff. I weren't happy, n if Abra knew she'd go mad. Catchin' food to eat was one thing, and enough death and morbidity for a kid.  "Don't let mama hear you say things like that Charlie." He looked at me, questionnin', but I shook my head "Jus' don't, k? She don't like that shit" He grinned round his sandwich and whispered

"Daddy, you did a swear"

"Yeah," I said "Daddy did swear. We don't swear in front of no one else though, do we?" He shook his head, still smilin' to himself like we shared some secret. I knew he felt like a big boy with me, n I guess one little secret between us wouldn't hurt his confidence at all.

* * *

 

The next morning was eerily still. I got up early to check any damage to the little small holding we ran. Luckily it was early in the season, and a lot of things hadn't been planted out, but I was hardly surprised to find chickens everywhere in a real state, one of the pens upside down 3 feet from where it should be. 

The sun wasn't yet peeking over the east fence, so in the relative dark I collected the coop and righted it, preparing to gather up the distressed hens. When I heard movement behind me I span, dropping the chicken I'd managed to grab and drawing my knife.

"Hey" Rick said, and I froze, knife in the air. 

"Jesus Rick, I hadn't checked the fences, I thought you were a walker. Don't creep up on people!" He smiled at me

"I've been out, checking the fences, they're fine. Look, about yesterday" I had put my knife back in its holster and was creeping slowly after hens again. I flapped a hand at him.

"It's ok, don't worry about it" I said, cooing at one of the girls to coax her closer

"No, Abra, what I said was wrong. Charlie is your kid." I nodded, grabbing the bird and putting her securely under my arm. 

"Yeah. Don't you ever say things like that in front of him. One day, when he's old enough to understand maybe, but he's so small and vulnerable." I shrugged. "I'm sorry, too. I just wanted to hurt your feelings." 

"I know." He put his right hand over the left side of his chest and feigned a sad expression "kinda did a little bit." I narrowed my eyes at him, putting the hen in the coop and looking for a second. 

"But you let him go hunting" Rick said thoughtfully, and I looked up, 

"He's with Daryl he's fine" he didn't reply. We just looked at each other across the fence to the chicken's run.

I began to feel uncomfortable and turned back to my work. He watched me a while, before saying

"I liked how you handled yourself out there yesterday. Got a proposition for you." I stood, having now captured the last hen and holding her under my arm. 

"I have work to do here" I said cautiously. I didn't want to go out without Daryl again. I didn't like the different styles of 'running' they had. Rick looked at me, head cocked, small smile in his face. 

"We'll check the horses, then I think we're good." He said, hopping the fence in one leap with one hand. I took a step back, out of his way, and stumbled over a chicken feeder, dropping the hen and landing in a heap. I swore under my breath, but Rick was there, holding my arm, ready to help me up.

We looked at each other for a moment, and we shared a laugh. His arm moved down mine until he had my hand in his, and he hefted me up from the mud.

"Uh" I said, I was covered in mud "I'm filthy!" He looked me up and down and smiled, raising his eyebrow. I looked away, spied the last runaway chicken and grabbed her up quick. 

"Ok" I said, to fill the weird silence between us "what's your plan?"


	4. Chapter 4

Rick told me what he wanted as we checked the horses, they'd calmed considerably except one mare who had a serious case of whale eye when ever we made a noise. I patted her and spoke to her, but she was incensed. We stood her in a stall at the back of the stable we had built, as far away from the buzz of Alexandria as possible. 

We headed back to the main house, and I noticed a shadow at the window. When we walked in, Carol was pacing with a very sleepy, red eyed, little Hershel in her arms. She smiled as we walked in, and she instantly explained.

"Maggie and Glenn are taking watch today. And this little guy is so weepy. I think he has a cold coming" she stroked his head and rocked him gently. The boy was five, but small for his age. He stared at me with big brown eyes, and I smiled at him. I knew how hard it would have been for Maggie to leave him. 

"We're heading out" Rick said pointedly, and Carol gave him a small smile 

"Again? People'll talk" I laughed at that. But Carol wasn't laughing. Confused I went to ask what was wrong, but Rick nodded toward the door, having got what he needed, and we left.

* * *

 

It was so still in the Mornin' Charlie couldn't believe it. 

"Did I dream the storm?" He asked rubbin' his eyes. I told him no, sometimes storms just pass. He seemed satisfied with that. I wondered if he would blindly believe everythin' n anythin' I said, n it hit me that parentin' could be a very dangerous game.   
It also made sense how people got it so wrong sometimes. 

"We gonna get a rabbit today daddy?"  
I smiled at him.

"Yeah, maybe four or five" his little eyes lit up n he grinned. 

"Stew!" He shouted with his arms up in the air. I shushed him. 

"Gotta keep it down, buddy. Outside the walls we stay very quiet." He put his hands over his mouth, and ducked his head into his shoulders. I ruffled his hair and hoisted up my 'bow.

* * *

 

I stretched my hands above my head, then bent and touched my toes, stretching out after the bumpy and uncomfortable ride. I heard a short cough behind me and saw Rick. 

"Oh. Sorry" I stood and turned to him. "So what first?" He pointed at the building in front of us.

We stood in the street, surrounded by dead walkers all decayed to almost nothing. A rabbit hopped down the sidewalk, having ventured out of the woods. This made me feel safe. Rabbits could sense the very smallest amount of danger. 

A 16wheeler sat, haphazard, in the road, either abandoned or overrun. I wondered what was inside, if anything, there was no branding or slogan on its sides. 

The building in front of us was an army and navy store, and we both doubted there would be much left, but Rick and Carl needed shoes.

Rick banged on the door and I waited, watching the street. It started to make sense why he wanted me. Daryl was away, Charlie was away. I needed to be kept busy, and it wasn't as if the farm needed much work until we started planting out. A month away.   
Spending as much time as I did with Daryl, I'd also undoubtedly learned a lot from him. 

The walkers came, clawing to get at Rick. I turned my back to the street, and stepped forward, a smile spreading in my face. 

"Let's go" I said.

* * *

 

We arrived home before dark. Charlie almost fallin' asleep in the car after our busy day. so much concentration had exhausted him. 

"Hey Charlie" I said, leanin in the passenger door for him, n he opened his eyes, yankin' his thumb from his little mouth, lookin' mortified that I'd seen him actin' like an actual child. "We're home" I said, reachin' my arms out. He was so tired he din't even try n complain, just put his arms up n let me carry him. 

I heard Glenn shuffle back toward the gate, n turned as one of our cars pulled in. Abra n Rick sat there, laughin' n smilin' together. I waited for 'em, Charlie snoozin' again, n when Abra saw me she almost jumped outta the car before it stopped rollin'

"Daryl" she stage whispered, happy to see me "he asleep?" She asked, reachin' her hand out to touch Charlie's head n then kissing me softly on the mouth. 

"Been out?" I asked, sterner'n I meant it, tryina be quiet with Charlie in my arms. She nodded, excited. 

"Yes" she said, plain n simple. But it din't sit right with me at all. She stepped away and looked at me, readin' my mood all over my face in that way she had. I turned n headed for home. Abra din't follow as quickly as I thought she would.

* * *

 

When I got in Charlie was in his cowboy and Indian nightclothes, having a warm, powdered, milk.

"We got bunnies!" He said, His voice full of sleep. 

"You got a milk moustache" I said, reaching out and wiping it away. "You have fun with daddy?" He nodded, tired, then looked at me very solemnly.

"bed" I smiled and took his mug from him, then hoisted him into my arms. 

"Daryl?" I called, and he appeared at the kitchen doorway with a face like thunder. I ignored it for now, not wanting to upset the little one. "Charlie's going to bed, you coming?" 

Charlie was asleep before his head hit the pillow. I shut his door quietly and Daryl grabbed my arm, practically dragging me down the stairs.

"Hey!" I said, pulling my arm from his grip "missed you too" he looked at me, eyes dark and narrow. 

"Did ya? Where ya been?" I looked at him, honestly astounded. 

"Out, with Rick." He was about to speak again, but I put my hand up "I told him no, but he insisted. And" I said, elongating the word so he couldn't cut in "its Rick. It's not like I was on my own." He glared at me, 

"You don't go out without me" I shook my head. 

"No, Not normally, but we got talking about the farm, and how we needed a greenhouse, so we went and got one. You need to stop." he shook his head at me, eyes blazing in his angry face. He chewed his lip, and I knew it was to keep from yelling too loud. 

"I told you not to go out without me" I glared right back at him, arms folded, defensive. 

"Get over yourself Daryl. I was fine with Rick. I'm sick of this argument" I shrugged my shoulders and I turned away from him, hoping to end the quarrel but he span me back to face him. "You want to stop being so hands on or one of these days I'm going to knock you the fuck out" I said calmly, and he let me go. 

"You don't understand" he said quietly, but firmly. I sighed 

"No. I don't think I do. I'm a big girl I can look after myself." He nodded at me gently,

"I know." I spread my hands before me.

"So what's the problem?" He didn't answer immediately. He watched my face and I watched his. Eventually he said

"If anythin' was to happen" I went to cut in, but he stopped me "I want to be the one, Abs." I tilted my head, confused.

"So, you're angry I might die, and you wouldn't get to watch?" He looked at the ceiling.

"I'm serious"

"Good!" I burst "this is my life we're talking about!"

* * *

 

I chewed my lip and stared at her, staring at me. She was flushed, annoyed. I like the way being angry makes her look. I don't know if that makes me a bad man, but I do. 

"I knew you didn't understand." I said finally. She just looked at me, waiting for an explanation. "Closure, Abs. That's all" she shook her head.

"That's why you insist I go with you and not alone? Cause you think I'll die? Jesus, I'd rather stay home!" She was getting loud, she put her fists in her hair.

"No," I said, unable to say what I actually meant, again. "I enjoy going out with ya, I like it when it's just us against the world out there, but I also know if anything was to happen to you I'd be with ya. Just us. Like it should be" 

* * *

 

I loved what being angry did to him, made his eyes glisten, his breath quicken. His face would go dark and brooding. I think that's why we often argue, then fuck. I can't help myself when faced with those deep, dark, deadly blue eyes. 

I chewed my cheek and he Just looked at me with his beautiful eyes and pouting mouth. I suddenly wanted to kiss him. 

"I can sit here and wait for the inevitable or I can go out and live my life." I said quietly, sidling up to him. Pushing my body into his. He chewed on his lip, what I would give to be the one the biting it, or the one being bitten

"You have to let me go," I said, staring at his mouth. Wanting it so badly "so I can come home and do this" I put my hands on the back of his head and in his hair, I moved in impossibly closer and kissed him softly. I pulled away and sighed "my god I missed you"


	5. Chapter 5

We lay together on the couch, she was fiddling with my fingers, interlocked with hers.

"Have you been Talkin' to Charlie bout walkers?" She stopped fiddling and turned her head to face me

"Yeah, just, you know, that they're bad" I nodded.

"He told me yesterday that ya have to shoot em in the head to kill em" she stiffened all over n I knew it weren't her who told him.

"We agreed" she said "need to know, he's too young" I took her hand back and laced my fingers through hers.

"Yeah. We did. I'll ask Carol in the mornin'." Abra rubbed her head on my chest and looked at our hands again.

"You think it was Carol?" I shrugged

"She watches him the most" I said.

* * *

 

I put my hand on Daryl's chest for leverage and sat up, the blanket pooling on my lap and revealing my nakedness. I thought again about locks on the doors and covered up. Why would Carol blatantly disregard our request as Charlie's parents? It didn't make sense, but if Daryl wanted to speak to her that was fine.

* * *

 

In the morning Rick and I put up the green house we'd acquired, with a little help from Carl from and an Alexandrian resident called Simon.

I would always think of us and them. Now it had been so long they were still 'the Alexandrians'.

It was hard work, digging in foundations and building each side of the glass house, but a lot of fun. Simon was good at digging, and I talked wistfully about getting goats.

"More animals means having to get more food" I looked at Rick, shielding my eyes with one hand and leaning on a shovel with the other. 

"Yes, but my kid wouldn't have to drink powdered milk anymore. And we could have cheese!" He smiled at me, heading back over with the wheelbarrow.

"I miss cheese" he said, as dreamily as I had.

* * *

 

After dinner that night I helped Carol with the washing up. She was quiet, thoughtful. I was happily humming away to myself, elbow deep in warm suds.

"That one of yours?" She asked me out of the blue, and I wondered what she meant.

"Oh the song?" I pushed my hair out of my eyes with my wrist, turning to her. "No, my music was awful" she smiled, then laughed.

"You know, Daryl was asking questions in here today. About you and Rick. You're spending a lot of time together just lately." I shrugged my shoulders. Daryl didn't mind. He knew I only had eyes for him.

"Really? That's so unlike him" I answered, putting the final late on the drainer and grabbing a towel to help her dry. "We just went in a couple runs, that's all." She looked at me a moment before nodding.

"I guess, you know what men are like" I smiled back at her, thinking that Daryl wasn't like other men, and she must have got the wrong end of the stick.

"He also asked me why Charlie has been saying things about killing walkers" I nodded

"Oh yeah, he said something while they were out, Daryl said he was going to ask"  
Carol suddenly turned to me with a fork in her hand, pointing it at me. Using it to accentuate her words.

"I didn't say anything like that to him Abra. I wouldn't do that" I narrowed my eyes at her, but she didn't back off. She just stood there, fork in the air, prongs in my direction. "And I don't like you putting thoughts like that in Daryl's head. Now if you want Charlie to know about the world that's fine but don't lie to Daryl and don't ever involve me!" I shook my head at her as the kitchen door opened. Carol quickly put the fork in a drawer. I turned to see Maggie had come in with Hershel.

"Still poorly?" I asked, noticing the little boys pale colour and tired eyes. Maggie nodded, and Carol left the room.

"I can't work out what's wrong with him, I might have to see dr Cloyd."

* * *

 

Rick approached me as everyone was filter in' away from the dinner table.

"Abra wants to get goats" he said. "I'm not normally one to give in, but milk and cheese would go down well if we could work out how to make that happen" I nodded. She'd mentioned goats to me before

"Might involve a lot more work." I said to him. "Filterin, pasteurisin'." Rick shook his head.

"Won't last as long unpasteurised, but we gotta go with what we can actually do here."

"Goats milk tastes like shit" I said, laughin' but Rick shot me down

"Gotta be better than powder. Look I know where there are some goats, saw them a while Ago. I want to take Abra to get them. Thought I'd better ask." I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Like ya did before?" Rick shrugged and cocked his head.

"You weren't here man" he leant forward across the table. "Can't ask if you're not here. Life goes on, just because you left she doesn't get to sit on her ass and worry. We have stuff to do. Things." I nodded at him. Me n Abra'd already agreed she could go out.

"Fine" I said, gettin' up and heading for the kitchen to take Abra home. "Just tell me where ya goin' n know that if she don't come home, I will be brayin' fer blood"

> * * *

I looked at Daryl, completely dumbfounded. He gave me his small smile and I shook my head.

"You're letting me go? You're going to stay and watch Charlie ad I can go out without you?!" He nodded his tiny nod.

"Yeah, but you gotta promise me several things" I smiled at him

"All ears" I said

"You do as you're told. You stay outta trouble. Trust your instincts and you better make sure you come home in one piece" I put my hand on his arm, looking up into his face.

"Of course" I rubbed his bicep and a heat started in my belly. I chewed my cheek, moving my hand from his arm and across his chest. "Kiss me" I said "I need to take part of you with me" he bent his head down to me, and obliged, dragging his tongue against mine. His goatee scraping my skin and leaving me raw. He pulled away before I was finished.

"Oh" I said following his lips as he leant back. I opened my eyes, an he was smiling.

"Come back whole, n soon, you can have more" he said gravely.  
I all but floated out the door to meet Rick.


	6. Chapter 6

I sat on the couch with Carol, Charlie n Hershel playin' at our feet.

"So you just let her go?" Carol was askin', her tone astounded.

"Mm, why not. I can't keep her here. What am I supposed to do? Lock er up?" Carol shrugged and Charlie ran his car into my foot. 

"Well. She's been spending a lot of time with Rick. I'm surprised how good you're being about it" I looked at her, confused and intrigued. 

"A lotta time? What's that mean?" She stalled a moment, looking like she'd let the cat outta the bag. 

"Oh, I dunno" she shrugged again, but more dismissive now. "Just, going outside together, building the green house together..." She looked at me, arms folded. "I'm being silly don't listen to me" I shook my head

"Nah, c'mon you obviously think somethin', might as well say now ya've started." She looked at me, eyes worried.

"Well, he seems to be doing a lot for her. The green house, the chicken feed, the goats." She shook her head.

"The farm's not Abra's. She runs the rotas n does the plannin' but it's communal. What they're doin', it's for everyone" But a seed'd been planted, n I won't lie n say I weren't a little suspicious. Rick had done other outta character things in the time I'd known him. But Abra?

"He saw her naked" Carol spurted, then covered her mouth, eyes glassy. She turned to the kids n told em to go play upstairs. I was just starin' at her. 

"He what?" Anger bubbled in my chest, where my heart was poundin' almost right out. I stood up as Carol sat back down. 

"Oh shit" she said, starin' at me as I paced. "It was weeks ago, I thought she would've told you" I chewed my thumb, annoyed. Naked?

"Naked!? How? Why?" She watched me, lookin sad and worried.

"Don't look into it too far, Daryl, she was in the shower, and he just walked in the house." I shook my head, I stomped back and forward behind the couch.  
"Daryl" she said "come and sit." I didn't. But I stopped pacin'. She patted the couch "c'mon" smilin' now. Fuckin' smilin' like she hadn't just dropped a bombshell. Like she hadn't just shown me what I couldn't see right before my eyes. 

"Damnit Carol" I sat. "Why're you tellin' me this?" She shrugged again.

"I shouldn't have. I'm sure it's nothing" she reached out to me, n I let her. "Come here, you're all antsy and stiff" she angled towards me and beckoned me back to her. "C'mon, let me have those shoulders" I looked back at her, not havin a clue what was goin on

"What? I don't need a massage, I need to go out there and see what that prick's tryin with my girl." I stood again, callin' for Charlie. Carol looked very angry. 

"I'm just telling you what I've seen. Rick's persuasive" I shook my head and laughed humourlessly. 

"Huh, yeah, but I know Abra, she ain't easily swayed." Charlie came crashing down the stairs, and we left, Carol din't say another word or try to stop us.

* * *

 

I looked at Rick beside me, then at the herd of goats in the open field in front of us. We'd been crouched behind a bush for ten minutes and I was fascinated. 

"Pregnant" I mouthed, pointing carefully at a nanny goat who seemed too fat to move. "Imagine the kids back home with a baby goat!" I was so excited it was ridiculous. All the things I did as a celebrity in the time before Hell overflowed, and I was excited about a pregnant goat. 

I was crouching in the mud next to a cop, watching them like a kid myself. Rick was smiling at me, my excitement wearing off on him. He adjusted the ropes he had coiled and thrown over his shoulder, and shuffled his feet to get comfortable.

"Ready to act the cowgirl?" He asked, referring to us lassoing the goats like cattle. I giggled quietly, uncontrollable in my joy.

Gently, Rick removed a coil or two and tied a loose Knot, which seemed intricate in its design. 

"It's called a Honda knot" he explained. I was impressed "yeah, I was in the scouts" he said with a proud smile. 

"It's similar to a poacher's knot" I said, marvelling at it. 

"It is, and it's not" he said. I smiled at him.

"Ba dum tsh" I said, straight faced. He ignored me, and crept forward with a lasso in his hand.

* * *

 

We got four goats, a harem of three, one the pregnant Nanny goat, and a ram. I won't lie, it was hard work, and I got butted more times than I care to talk about. 

Bruised, worn out, Rick and I leaned against the side of the RV, the goats secure inside with a makeshift pen. I put my hand on my chest and felt my heart racing even as my breath slowed. 

"Winded?" Rick asked, his breathing slower to return to normal. I smiled

"Counting my bpm" I shrugged "old habits." He nodded, and crouched down on his haunches, back still against the RV. I looked down at him. "We should get back before our luck changes" I observed, we'd been unusually fortunate in not meeting walkers so far. He nodded at me and stood up easily, he'd caught his breath now. He put his hand on the door handle and looked back at me, smiling. 

"I've had a good day today Abra. I've not had much fun for a while." I shielded my eyes with my hand, looking into his face.

It was true. He'd been a miserable shit for a while back at the beginning of Alexandria. Since terminus, since Carol killed David and Karen. If I was completely honest, he'd been a miserable shit most of the time I'd known him.

I just grinned at him, in the bright sunshine. It was a beautiful day. He opened the door when I didn't answer, and headed in, instantly chatting to the goats. He'd definitely been more calm and rational recently.

I took hold of the door, getting my foot on the small metal steps of the truck, when something grabbed my foot. 

Fuck.

"Rick!" I yelled, thinking this was my fault for jinxing our luck. His face showed up in front of me. I was blocking the door, if I let go of the frame I'd be dragged down, if I stayed where I was I was dead. 

I pulled my leg and a second hand came and grabbed my ankle.  
Still holding on to the door with one hand I pulled my knife out with the other and bit my lip before throwing myself back off the little metal steps. I landed, and rolled, looking down at me feet. The walker was climbing, testing first my shoes for edibleness. I kicked at it, and though it backed off it came right back.

"Shit. Rick!" I couldn't get up, I couldn't reach it, and I didn't want to just wait and see what was going to happen.

I kicked again at the stinky bastard as Rick shut the door to the RV and leaped down, he stabbed the walker in the eye with ease and reached to help me to my feet. I took his hand, it was shaking. Or was that me? 

"You took your fucking time!" I said to him, dusting off my ass. 

"Abra" he said calmly. I dusted my knees and checked them, road rash. Marvellous. "Abra" he said again as I holstered my knife. "ABRA"

"What!?" I yelled back, turning to him, he wasn't facing me. He was watching the distant horizon where more of the walkers appeared to have converged, stumbling and moaning in the distance. 

"Get in the RV." He said, dragging me to the door.

We raced back to Alexandria, noting the herd was heading the same way. 


	7. Chapter 7

She burst through the door startlin' me n Charlie.

"Daryl" she blurted, breathless, "we have to get everyone together. We have a problem" I looked at her, not movin' 

"Yeah, we gotta problem" I said, calm, quiet. But she shook her head

"well, yours can wait. We have a herd situation." Charlie looked between us.

"Wha'sa herd saturation?" He was very concerned at his mom's excitement. Abra scooped him up and kissed him on the cheek.

"Nothing for little men to worry about, but me and daddy and everyone else need to have a chat about stuff. You wanna play with Hershel?" She eyed me over his head, her big green eyes taking over her face, n I knew now was not the time to 'chat' bout Rick.

I sighed. She was beautiful. N standin' there with Charlie she looked small, fragile n superhuman all at once. I got up, n headed out with them both.

Rick had already gathered everyone up. When we walked in all concerned faces were turned to him, he had everyone's attention. They were rapt. It made me feel a resentment towards him I'd never had before. But it'd have to wait. 

"Me n Abra came across a herd today" he was sayin'. Abra put Charlie down n took his hand, talkin' to him quietly before sendin' him off to find Hershel. 

"Now I know we have had problems dealing with something like this in the past" I'd heard about that, during my six month absence. There were murmurs in the group, disgruntled Alexandrians mostly.

"However, I think we can deal with this in a much simpler way. No leading them off, no leaving Alexandria without protection" I looked at Abra, she was rapt, too, and it made me so mad. 

"What're you gonna do?" Someone was askin' "if it's as many as you say there's no point even trying" 

"How many?" I asked, n Abra shook her head gently. 

"Wait" was all she said. 

"I know that you're scared, and I know that my plan didn't come through before. I'm happy to take suggestions, if you have any." For a moment you coulda heard a pin drop. I looked around at all the scared and worried faces of the Alexandrians, the stoic, hard, weathered expressions of our own group.

Some suggestions came through, that we round em up n try the lead away again, that we dig a trench, that we pick them off.  
Rick was shakin' his head, face stern. 

"Killing one walker is not too difficult, but there are four for every one of us out there, picking them off... Not really an option." He cocked his head, Lookin' around him. 

"What about after?" Carol had been standin' in the corner, quiet, unassumin' in her role as soccer mom. "Once they're dealt with there will be more. And more and more" she shrugged her shoulders "we'll never be safe" Rick looked at her, his patience shortenin'. 

"The construction site!" Abra suddenly became animated, and Rick turned and put his arm on her shoulder. Carol Looked at me pointedly, eyebrows all up in her hairline. "Do we have a 'dozer? A compactor?"  
I watched as light pinged on behind the eyes of those in front of us. It was a fine idea. 

"Great, just great," Rick was sayin' "The walkers are maybe a day away if they stay slow. Can we get the construction vehicles ready tonight? Do we have the fuel to do it?" Abra was grinnin', proud n smug, to herself n Rick's fuckin' hand was still on 'er shoulder.

Finally he let her go after givin' her shoulder a squeeze. I grit my teeth, Carol still lookin' at me. 

Tobin, Abraham n Rick got into a conversation together, n everyone else started chattin' amongst themselves.

* * *

 

"You ok?" I asked Daryl as the crowd split off into groups, murmuring quietly. "You're standing there like you have a pole up your ass" he really was, all stiff and straight. I could almost hear his teeth grinding together.   
"Daryl?" I asked again when he didn't answer. 

"I hafta go" he said, firm, quiet. I went to ask him what the hell was going on, but a blood curdling yell caught my attention instead

"Maaaaaamaaaaaaaaaa" Charlie.  
My heart stopped, then sped up to light speed, and I ran through the crowd to the stairs where the scream came from, Daryl with me the whole way.  "Mom, Daddy, it's Hershel" Charlie appeared at the top on the landing, crying and scared. Maggie shot between me and Daryl, and Charlie began to climb down the stairs. He put his arms up for me and I took him, as Maggie appeared at the top of the stairs herself, cradling Hershel, his arms waving like he was swimming. 

"He's having a seizure!" She yelled.

Dr Cloyd saw to Hershel. The group split off and went their separate ways during the drama. Charlie was snoozing fitfully on my shoulder, traumatised, worried. 

We sat at the table, waiting for news. Carol looked panicked. She had a special bond with the kids here. Daryl was still acting like there was a broom handle up his butt. But he hadn't left, like he said he was going to. 

I watched him carefully. He ground his teeth and bit his lip. He barely looked up from the table.

Glenn came back from the infirmary, but he was without Maggie and Hershel. Hershel was on a drip, induced into a deep sleep, he said, so the doc could bring his temperature down. Maggie was with him. I took Glenn's hand and gave it a squeeze. 

"If you need anything" I said, but he just smiled and said quietly 

"Yeah, I know." I turned to Daryl

"We should get this one home" I said, and I'd barely finished when he was up and heading for the door.

 

We put Charlie in his bedroom, despite it being early. He looked up at us earnestly, asking after his friend.

"Hershel's resting" I told him. He seemed satisfied, and drifted off again. We watched him for a bit, before Daryl walked off without a word again. I sighed, following.

* * *

 

"What's up with you tonight" she asked me, "what happened while I was out there?" She began to undress for a shower.

It wasn't her fault I was angry, Hell, it might easily be completely innocent, Just Carol stickin her goddammed oar in. I sighed.

"I'm just tired" I said. She narrowed her eyes at me, not believin' a word of it. She pulled her pants off and turned to grab a towel outta the cupboard. As she turned back I saw the bruises, the scrapes on her knees.

"What the fuck happened out there?" I asked, jumpin' up from where I sat on the bed. 

"Uh, I got grabbed by a walker"  
She was completely nonchalant. "The thing grabbed my leg and I fell down on my knees, that's when we saw the herd." She looked at her legs "kinda looks like carpet burn" she smiled a cheeky smile at me, and I couldn't help but smile back. 

"Nah that don't look like carpet burn, I'll show ya carpet burn". I whispered, unable to keep my hands off'a her no matter how angry I was before. Of course Rick might be tryin it on, she was hot as fuck.

But then the door opened with a creak and we both turned to see Charlie, pale and sweatin'. 

"I don' feel very goot"

 


	8. Chapter 8

Daryl rushed off to the infirmary hoping Denise would be able to leave Hershel for a while. I got dressed and sat Charlie on the bed, a damp cloth on his head, hoping to bring his temperature down.  
He vomited, and shuddered and I hoped he didn't have what Hershel had.

When Daryl and the doctor came in Charlie was shivering and telling me he was freezing.  
He felt like a furnace.

"I'd give him a cold bath and see if he can get some sleep. If he's no better in the morning bring him down to the infirmary" Denise was saying, packing away her thermometer and stethoscope.

"You don't know what it is" Daryl said, it wasn't a question, more an accusation. She looked at him patiently.

"Daryl I'm a psychologist. I'm doing what I can. Let me check some medical journals, if you don't bring him in ill come by tomorrow." I thanked her and saw her out.

"She's the best we have" I explained to Daryl as we stood watching the bath fill up. "She'll do right by him, she always has." I pushed my hair out of my face and sat on the closed lid of the toilet. "One of us will have to stay back tomorrow. We can't leave him" but Daryl shook his head.

"Nah, if he's not at the doctor's office he can stay with Carol. We're needed out there" I sighed, he was right, but we were also needed at home.

Charlie got in bed with us, his temperature soaring, his sleep not restful at all. He was sick several times, and at 5am, shattered and hot ourselves, we took him to the infirmary.

Maggie was asleep in a chair by Hershel's side. He looked so small in the big hospital bed. Tears stung in my eyes. That's not what I wanted for my little boy.

"No better?" Doctor Cloyd asked, coming out of a side room, rubbing alcohol on her hands. I shook my head and put a hand on Charlie's forehead over Daryl's shoulder.

"Still hot, has barely slept, vomiting." Denise nodded.

"Ok, Hershel is doing better since he was on the drip. I think we do the same for Charlie." A drip?

"I don't know" I started, but Daryl shook his head at me.

"You find anythin' out in ya books?" He asked, and she went a little quiet.  
"Denise?" Daryl insisted, she looked at him a little worried.

"Honestly, it sounds like side effects. You know like, codeine or Vicodin" she shrugged "but that's highly unlikely. I'm still checking this out. Let's get him more comfortable," I looked at Daryl, astounded. Drug abuse?

"He can't even reach the bathroom cabinet" I said to myself. "How..." But they were laying Charlie down, and he too looked tiny in the huge hospital bed.

He woke up, petrified, and cried when the cannula went in. It broke my heart.

"Everyone's getting ready to go" Daryl said, coming back from the window. "C'mon, we can't just sit n mope over him, that ain't helpin' no one" Maggie, now awake, assured us she'd watch him, and I agreed to go. Charlie was finally sleeping peacefully. It was the best outcome I could ask for, for now.

* * *

 As we gathered at the gates Carol appeared, arms folded, face concerned.

"How's Charlie?" She asked, soundin' desperate. I wondered where she'd heard, but word always got round in a small town.

"Not great, he's at the infirmary if you wanna see 'im, but he needs to rest. He got no sleep" she nodded, eyes glassy and sad. She looked like she did when Sophia ran off. I adjusted the strap of my crossbow and put a hand in her shoulder "he'll be ok, Carol." N though I weren't entirely convinced myself, she nodded, her hand at her mouth.

"You're both going out?" She said, noddin' in Abra's direction, "good. You should keep an eye on them, I don't like it"

"Stop" I said to her, angry, "ain't nothin' in it, just two people workin' together to help everyone." She looked at me, face hard, despite almost being in tears a moment before.

"I'm not stupid, Daryl, and neither are you. After a while things get stale, if someone else is show in' an interest..."

"Ain't nothin' stale bout it" I gestured at her, at mine and Abra's home. "Din't get kicked outta ya house for bein' too damn quiet did we?" She shrugged, n scurried away.

I turned n saw Anra comin' over, askin if Carol was alright. 

"Yeah, was askin after Charlie, n tellin' me that you n Rick spend too much time together" Abra's face scrunched up and she watch Carol go into the house.

"Huh. She said the same thing to me the other day. That you were asking." We looked at each other, n then at the door, now firmly closed behind Carol.

"There isn't" she said and I looked at her, questionin' "Anything going on." She clarified. "I did meet this one guy though, in the woods. I charged at him with my knife and he pointed his bow and arrow at me" n before I could answer she was walkin' away.

"Fuckin' bow n arra, it's a crossbow" I called after her.

* * *

 The herd had grown. Either that or Rick and Abra had underestimated its size in the first place.

We had a few heavy construction vehicles, but it weren't ever gonna be 'nuff. The rest of us picked off what we could while Abraham, Bruce, n Tobin drove back n forth over the bastards.

Anra n I got split up. A jcb drove between us n then I couldn't see her no more. I worried, but there was shit to be gettin' on with, so that's what I did. I had to get over her bein' out without me. Shit, how long has she lasted alone before we even found her?

* * *

 

I found myself with Rick, backed in a corner and attacking a group of about 20 walkers who had split from the main pack. We moved backward as they advanced, and Rick fell over some hummock or his own feet or something and landed on the floor, bringing two walkers down with him. He slammed his machete into the skull of the one on top of him, while I stabbed the one on top of that.

More advanced, and I had to get Rick up, but he stumbled again, as he did a walker launched out of the bushes behind him and grabbed his leg. What I saw haunted my dreams for a while. The walker pulled itself along his leg and I swear, to this day, that Rick got bit on the hip. I stamped on the walkers head, grazing Rick's leg in the process, then pulled him up off the floor with a strength I didn't even possess when not fighting a hoard, and we stumble-ran away.

"Are you bit?" I asked him, but he didn't answer, just hobbled along with his arm across my shoulders. Groaning and moaning under his breath.

I was sweating. I could feel rivers of it running down my face and into my eyes, taste it on my lips. I was exhausted, and frightened, and I didn't know what the hell I was going to do with my bitten companion.

"The hut" I said, but Rick didn't appear to hear me, he was whimpering to himself now, muttering about Carl and Judith.


	9. Chapter 9

With walkers hot on our heels we reached the fenced hut we'd built in the woods. Perfect shelter for anyone caught out not too far from home, and a safe place for anyone stranded. 

It had locks inside the doors and supplies to last a few days. Aaron and Eric regularly checked it out and restocked as necessary. Daryl didn't run with Aaron often anymore, he'd taken a turn against 'new people'.

We slammed the door, Rick hobbled over to the cot bed and sat down, ripping off his boot. His ankle was swelling, he must have twisted it when he fell. 

"Rick" I said as he studied the damage. He looked up at me, hair curled with sweat, liquid dripping off the tendrils and onto the floor. 

"Twisted" he said. "Fuck it hurts so bad" I nodded, sure it did. But my eyes kept glancing across the rip in his jeans at his hip. I licked my lips, still salty but feeling dry. 

"Need to check you over. That Walker had blood dripping out of its mouth. I'm worried" I walked up to him, but he was defiant

"I didn't get bit" I slowly shook my head.

"No, Ok. Can we check?" He put his hand over his hip as I crouched to it, covering the jagged rip which could have been made by rotting teeth or reaching fingers.

He pulled his hand away, face confused. Blood, thick and congealing, coated his middle and ring fingers. 

"No" he said quietly, standing and unbuttoning his fly. "No!" Louder now. I knelt there in front of him and watched as his jeans slid to the floor. His hip was bruised, red, and bloody. It would need wiping off before we could see if it was a bite. I pulled of the long sleeved tshirt I wore and began to dab at his skin.

"I'm not hot. I'm not bit. I don't feel bit"

* * *

 

I watched as Abra n Rick stumbled off into the distance, Rick clearly hurt. I gathered my bolts from the walkers round me and went to follow, but I was called for help by Tara, who'd got herself cornered against a jcb which had run out of fuel. She began to climb the giant tracks it sat on n I took out the walkers around her. 

"Thanks" she said, jumpin down "I think we're nearly there" she looked around "I'm going to find Rosita. Where's Abs?" But I left her to do what she would, thinkin' Abra n Rick might my help.

I followed their zig zagged track to the hut, n noticed that the gate in the fence was locked, but the door was open. They musta been in a hurry. Whatever had chased them weren't around, so I hopped the fence n pulled the door the resta the way open with my heel. 

I din't understand what I was seein at first.

Rick, his back to me, standin' next to the bed with his pants round his ankles, Abra's left hand curled around his thigh. I knew it was Abra, she was still wearin' the ring. She was kneeling in front of him.  
"What the fuck is this?" I asked, liftin' my bow up to my eye ready to shoot the pair of them.   
Abra's face appeared as Rick turned to face me. 

"Oh" Abra said, n stood up fast, her tshirt still balled up in her hand. 

"Oh? Fuckin' oh? There's walkers out there gettin the better of us n Charlie in a hospital bed n all ya c'n say is 'oh'?" Rick put his hands in the air, a white flag. 

"Daryl, calm down. I know how it looks" Abra went to move forward, n without thinkin I trained the crossbow on her. 

"Hey, Daryl, Rick's hurt. We thought he got bit..." I cut her off

"Gonna suck the pain right out, huh?" She took another step forward. 

"Shut your damn mouth you ignorant prick and look at Rick." I rubbed my cheek on my shoulder but didn't move. "Fucking look at him!" She yelled, pointin', so I did, keepin the crossbow where it was I turned my head. Rick's leg was covered in streaks of blood, his hip all raw and inflamed. "I was wiping the blood off" she was saying quietly now "we thought he was bitten, I swear I thought I saw him get bitten" I dropped the bow to my side.

"Goddammed Carol gettin in my head" I said. Abra looked at me concerned and Rick just looked confused.

"Carol?" I nodded, heftin' the bow so it pointed at the ceilin'.

"Sorry" I said to him, redressing himself. 

"T's'alright" he said, "forget it. How is it out there?" I shook my head.

"Runnin low on fuel, had a coupla near misses" Abra approached me, her tshirt still in her fist. The vest she was wearin' stickin' to her skin. 

"I've hurt my ankle" Rick was sayin' "you two get back there, I'm not gonna be any help right now, but we have to thin the bastards out as much as we can." Abra put her hand on my arm gently, and looked in my face. 

"Ok?" She asked, n I was. My heart was poundin' n I felt foolish, but I was ok. 

"Yeah. Maybe."

"Carol told me to spend more time with Abra" Rick explained. "Said she was getting depressed and I needed to get her up, get her working." We all looked at each other a moment in confused n uncertain silence. "But can it wait?" He asked. Me n Abra understood, n we ran out of the hut, leapin' the fence as Rick locked himself in, n went back to help the others.

* * *

 

The herd had split into groups, and as we got close we were told that one group had got away, Still heading for Alexandria.

"How many?" Daryl asked, but Rosita shrugged 

"Maybe 50, maybe a hundred. They won't get in, we'll get back and take them out from the platform."   
The rest were dead. All around us the spent bodies lay on the floor, and there was a quiet amongst the group. 

"We can't burn all these" I said to Daryl "it'll bring more." He nodded, grabbing Glenn who looked fraught. 

"We gotta split these up. Make a few small fires. So as not to alert the rest of the assholes. Reckon you c'n help pile some in a truck?" Glenn nodded 

"Sure" 

Daryl, Rosita, Tara and I along with some Alexandrians, headed back home, hoping to cut the smaller herd off as the others started the task of splitting and burning the corpses. 

We hadn't lost any lives, and despite a crossbow being pointed at my head again, for the hundredth time, it had been a good day for the humans. 

"One of these days, Dixon," I said in the car as we pulled away "you're gonna point that thing at me and it will just go off, and that'll be that" I heard a stifled giggle behind us and turned to see Tara and Rosita covering their mouths. I rolled my eyes and looked back at Daryl who was also trying not to laugh.

"Children" I said, laughing myself. "C'mon, let's swing by and get Rick." 


	10. Chapter 10

We'd barely pulled up when I jumped from the car, heading for the infirmary. Daryl yelled something but I barely heard him. Rosita and Tara climbed for the tower and platform where Sacha and Carl already stood guard. 

The door of the surgery flew inwards unexpectedly and Michonne appeared looking furious. 

"Oh, Michonne, I'm glad I found you" she cut me off, manhandling me down the porch steps.

"We have a situation" she said gravely. "Carol" she started to say more, but I heard a yell from inside. I pushed Michonne out of my way and took the porch steps in a single leap. Why was Carol the only name I was hearing recently?  
There was more yelling as I threw the door open again and ran in, with no clue of what I was going to find. 

Carol was standing with Charlie in her arms. He was frightened, crying. He turned to me with his huge blue eyes as I stopped in the doorway of the treatment room.  
Denise was standing, her hands outstretched, palms forward, speaking quietly to Carol. Maggie was sitting by Hershel's bedside, watching what ever drama was unfolding ready to jump to Hershel's protection in a second.

"You!" Carol hissed at me venomously. I noticed now that she was wielding her knife, and she used it to point at me as she spoke. "You started this. You made this happen" I instinctively held my hands up, mirroring Denise. 

"What did I do, Carol." I was panicking, heart racing in my chest so fast I thought it might give out. But my voice was calm. "Tell me what I did and I can try to make it right" I began to sweat, worried for my boy. "Is this about Daryl?" I asked, wondering if Daryl was right to expect me to be jealous. After all, she had been trying to drive some sort of wedge between us.   
She laughed, loud, cruel and without humour. 

"Oh you dumb bitch" she spat out, "that hillbilly yokel had his chance and turned it down. I'm not after your precious cornfed boyfriend" her face turned sour, as if she could taste the vile things she was saying. I was about to ask more, feeling I might be getting somewhere when she turned without warning and ran.

* * *

 

As Michonne approached lookin' like hell I knew straight away it was me she was after, not Rick, not anyone else. Police Constables only ever approached you like that with bad news.

She went to speak, when a crash from the infirmary caught my attention, and Carol went runnin' by, headin' for the gate. She had a bundle in her arms and I couldn't make out what it was.

"She has Charlie" Michonne blurted out in a rush, and we both turned after her. She yanked open the gate and left, not botherin' to close it behind her. She din't know there was a small herd approachin', the danger she was gettin' herself n my son into. 

We followed her, runnin', but I heard Abra callin' me. I turned n yelled.

"She went outside!" And turned back again, all the time still headin' for the gate.

"Wait!" She called, rushed, scared. I stopped n turned, not sure if this would be wastin' time. Denise was with her, n she looked worried. 

"She's lost her mind" The doctor said as they caught up. "Let me come with you, I'm sure I can help."  
"M

"There's walkers comin'" I warned, but she shrugged

"Please" she said, so the three of us went after her, Michonne hangin' back as Rick came hobblin' to see what the commotion was for.

"She's in her right mind enough to know she's in the wrong" we'd stopped, both for breath and to check the surroundin's. 

"What do you mean?" Abra asked the doc, listenin' but also checking for prints.

"Well" the doc still sounded nervous and unsure if herself. "She said 'you made me do this' that's a clear admission of guilt, even if she thinks it's your fault she's doing wrong" I looked up, checkin' the leaves on a bush for signs someone'd passed through in a rush.

"What the hell happened" I asked. But no one had time to answer,

"Daryl" Abra called me, "look" she was standin' next to a thorny bush, and flappin' in the breeze was a yellow scrap fabric about an inch square. Charlie had been wearin' a yellow jumper. 

I checked the ground, the angle of the rip, n led the girls forward. It seemed like Carol was takin' a strange route to our cabin, but it was definitely where she was headed.

* * *

 

The gate was open, the door was open, and walkers milled around the outskirts of the land the hut stood on. I cursed Carol and damned her for leaving the gate open. Was she really that far gone? 

We entered, quiet, and as we approached the door I could hear Charlie's sniffles. Daryl immediately put a hand on my chest, holding me back before I even formed the thought to just run inside. 

"Carol" Denise called through the open door. "I just want to talk with you." She pulled the door the rest of the way, and walked in slowly. 

"I don't need to talk, the time for talking is done" Carol spat, and as Charlie called me, even walkers couldn't have kept me away. 

"Charlie, mommy's here" I said gently, stepping in and showing Carol I was unarmed by holding up my arms. 

"You aren't his mother" she said, "you don't deserve him even if you were. And you!" Her eyes shifted as Daryl came in "you're just as bad as she is" 

"Put Charlie down, Carol. It don't gotta be this way" she hugged him tighter and shook her head slowly

"No. No I won't. You don't deserve him. I proved that already" I narrowed my eyes at her and Denise moved a step forward. As she did Carol pulled her dagger out again, wielding it at the doctor.   
"Stay there. Don't you dare move any closer" 

"How" Denise said, Stopping just a foot away from Carol and Charlie "why don't they deserve him? What did they do?" Carol still had her knife at arms length, pointing it at each of us and all of us. None of us were wielding our weapons. We had at least that much sense. 

"They left him! He's always with me, then I had to make him sick to prove a point" my heart sank. She did it?

"what did you give him, Carol." Denise asked, and Carol waved her hand in the air 

"Oh nothing, just some crushed up pills in the milk powder." She looked square at me "and you left him, I knew you would. You're not fit to look after a kid. You're not fit to look after yourself!" Daryl took a step forward now, in my defence, and Carol turned to him, knife shaking in her outstretched hand. Charlie wasn't fussing, I think he was literally petrified, scared stiff. 

"Carol" he said, but she cut him dead. 

"Back the fuck up!" she hissed, and Charlie started crying again, he never had liked conflict.

"Did you drug Hershel too?" Denise asked, stacking up the information to help with treatment, I guessed.

"I had to. I didn't think he'd have a seizure. But Maggie's a good mom." She turned back to me and Daryl "unlike you!" She accentuated her words with her knife, and her voice rang out loudly. 


	11. Chapter 11

We listened as the crazy woman in front of us listed all the things wrong with our situation. Charlie didn't speak properly, he couldn't read, he didn't know how to kill walkers, he didn't realise that people had to be put down if they died of natural causes or just hadn't turned.

It was hard to listen to, but any move we made could have been disastrous.

"He don't need to read. He can track, he can make a snare" Daryl said, "Important stuff, that actually matters" He was getting frustrated "What happened to Sophia..."

"Don't you talk about her. Don't you dare" Denise looked at me, questioning

"Her daughter" I explained

"Stop" Carol shouted "This is nothing to do with Sophia"

"Carol" Daryl tried again, hands reaching out, surprisingly not angry, but calm. "There're walkers comin', we need to get home, safe. We c'n talk there" Carol was shaking her head. I could see that Charlie was getting heavy for her to carry. He was 6, after all, and must have weighed about 45 pounds.

She shuffled him in her arms and I don't know what possessed me, but I made a grab for him. Throwing myself forward on leaden legs, I reached for him, and he reached for me, but Carol was on form. Even if she had lost her mind she hadn't lost her perception, and she slashed me across the arm before I could take him away. I jumped back, worried that all I had done was make things worse for us all. My arm spewed blood from the rough wound her blade had made in my bicep. I just felt numb

"I'm _done_ with talking. You don't get to have a child. You can't even _have_ a child. You don't deserve him. I tried to make you see that, I tried to split you in two but it didn't work" She was splitting me in two right now, and I still didn't understand why. "I am a mother without a child" she said, tears springing in her eyes, and suddenly it all made sense. "You bring me here, and you treat me like a babysitter. _I am not a babysitter_!"

Daryl spoke up, still quiet and calm.

"That's a role you brought on yourself" He looked at Carol earnestly, and was about to speak again when the grunting, groaning, moaning sound of walkers reached our ears.

Denise, who had watched the whole exchange with interest, drew her knife and turned to the door. I would have done the same, but my arm was inflexible.

With us turned away Carol saw her chance and barged through us to the door and into the woods.

"Shit" Daryl managed, chasing after her. Charlie was screaming. Throughout all of this he had been quiet and wide eyed, but now he was making enough noise to wake the dead

Or draw in the undead.

I ripped off the long sleeve tshirt I wore, crusted and stiffening with Rick's drying blood, I tore it in half and wrapped it around my arm tightly. The pressure helped, and I managed to draw my knife and follow Daryl and Carol outside.

Walkers were everywhere. They pushed against the 4 foot fences and reached in with their greying and rotting arms. I couldn't see Daryl or Carol anywhere. Had they really gone through these assholes and got out? I took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. If they could do it, I could too. I had no heavy child, no heavy crossbow, and I Was faster, more nimble, than them both.

I saw a gap in the crowd, and I went for it, Denise behind me telling me no. But Carol had my boy. Regardless of DNA _Charlie was mine._

* * *

 I followed, helpless to do anythin' else, as Carol ran from the cabin.

"What're ya tryin'a prove?" I asked as we stopped half a mile out. She din't answer. She looked around her, plannin' her next move. "Walker's're comin', Carol, Charlie could get hurt." Her face changed, concerned. Talkin' 'bout Charlie seemed to be the key. She caressed his head as he cried, this whole time he cried, n it tore me up that I couldn't comfort him myself. 

"shh" she coaxed him, bouncin' him like a baby. "The monsters'll come." I wanted to tell her that wasn't how he liked to be held, not how we spoke to him. He could hear desperation in yer voice, n reacted backwards. If I was a bad parent I wouldn't know that. If she was so much better, she would.

"Carol" I tried again, but she stepped backward, away from me. "Don't make me do somethin' we might all regret" I said angrily, "This has gone on long 'nuff now"

"You can't keep him _safe_ " She howled. "You don't, I do." She turned again, as if to head away, but a walker appeared out of the brush beside her, n knocked her, startled, off course. She stumbled, but continued to move. Ignorin' the walker I followed

" _This_ ain't safe " I yelled at her "How is this safer'n home?" She turned to me, n Charlie wiggled in her arms knocking her off balance. She stumbled, fell to her knees, n though she gripped him tight, he twisted and freed himself.

"No!" She screamed, as he got up n ran for me, "Charlie"

"Daddy!"  He raised his arms as he approached, n I saw more walkers appear all around us. I grabbed Charlie's hand n lifted him that way, as a walker reached for him. He din't yelp, but it musta hurt. I swung him up onto my shoulders, n he held on with a death grip, pinchin' at my cheeks.

We were surrounded. I jogged up to Carol n grabbed her hand as she knelt on the floor in a mess of tears and nonsense words. She let me drag her to her feet, but when I did she reached for Charlie again n I firmly pushed her away, pullin' out my knife with my free hand.

"Don't make me do somethin' we might all regret" I said again, eyein' her harshly, knife at the ready.. "We gotta run, Carol." N she nodded at me. I hoped she was finally seein' sense.

I couldn'ta been more wrong.

* * *

 

I ran for half a mile, maybe more. My arm throbbed and my legs ached, but not half as much as my heart which hammered and spluttered in my chest, aching for my arms to hold my boy, safe from walkers, safe from Carol.

I rounded a fallen tree and saw them, struggling. Daryl with Charlie on his shoulders, Carol with her knife glittering and deadly in her hand, 5 or so walkers closing in. She pulled the knife down to her side and I ran forward as she dug it into Daryl thigh, twisting it firmly before pulling it back out.

"Hey!" I yelled, as Daryl dropped to one knee with a grunt and Charlie tumbled off his shoulders, rolly polling into the path of the oncoming assholes.

As Carol moved for him I grabbed the back of her jacket and pushed her to one side, dashing in front of Charlie and downing a walker before grabbing my boy and checking him over.

As Carol began to approach again I pulled out my gun and aimed it square at her head.

"I've had enough of you," I yelled, "you crazy fucking son of a bitch" I heard a walker behind me, not that I needed to as Charlie screeched in my ear. I turned and shot it down, causing Charlie to scream again, traumatised. I hushed him.

"We stay quiet outside don't we?" I asked, and he dropped off into shuddering snivels. "Oh that's fantastic you are so brave. _So brave_ " I turned back around to see Daryl now on two feet, and Carol gone from sight. 


	12. Chapter 12

"Fuck" Abra sputtered, dashin' towards me with Charlie still snivellin' in her arms. "Oh shit Daryl" she bent to my leg, "you're gonna need stitches" 

"Stop swearin" I managed through gritted teeth as she examined me. She stood n rolled her eyes. 

"I think we're past that one today" I turned away as I heard someone call our names. Michonne n the doc, runnin through the trees, Michonne downin' walkers like a fuckin' superhero.   
My leg was killin me, n I knew I needed to get home, Charlie would need some kind of therapy, Abra was hurtin' too. But we needed to find Carol. 

"We have a car" The doc said. "You need to get your wounds looked at" Abra was shakin' her head, bouncin' from foot to foot.

"Take Charlie and Daryl home" she said, handin' Charlie to Denise. He screamed bloody murder, but Abra spoke to him quietly and he calmed a little, sniffin', eyes still leakin' 

"What bout you" I asked her, knowin' full well what she was plannin'.

"I have to find her" she said, leanin' forward n kissin' my cheek "she's sick, she can't be alone" I narrowed my eyes at her.

"That really why?" N she just shrugged at me. 

"I'll go too" Michonne said, n it made me feel better knowin Abra wouldn't be alone. I had no choice but to go with the doc n Charlie. I couldn't help no one' if I was hobblin'.

I got in the car, Charlie on my lap clingin' onto me like I might disappear, n we left Abra n Michonne to hunt down Carol. 

"Daddy?" Charlie asked me, so quietly I wondered at first if I imagined it. I looked down at him, a difficult task with him wrapped around me like A scarf. "Wha's wrong with Annie Carol?" I smiled and kissed the top of his head

"Auntie Carol ain't feelin' like herself right now, kiddo" he nodded 

"She's angry at me" I took his arms from my neck and leant back from him so I could speak directly to him.

"No Charlie. No one is angry with you. Auntie Carol just needs... A rest" I decided "you get cranky when ya tired, Auntie Carol is very very tired"

* * *

 

"She went this way" I said, pointing through a gap in the trees. "Everyone get home yet?" Michonne nodded, treading carefully through the grass, one hand on her katana. 

"Yeah. Everyone's home" I nodded back

"Good." 

"You should be there" she said pointedly. "Rick wanted me to come and relieve you and Daryl" I looked at her sideways, still facing front she eyeballed me right back. 

"Did he now?" I asked thoughtfully. If I knew Rick, I knew exactly what he meant. "She's sick, Michonne, she might seem deadly, she stabbed Daryl and cut me, but I think she's just sick." Michonne nodded

"Mhm" she stopped suddenly and put her back against a tree, I did the same beside her and looked carefully around. One loan walker, ambling around in front of us. I went to take my machete from my leg, but it was too heavy in my damaged arm and I decided against it. Instead Michonne drew her katana and sliced it's head off in a very impressive movement. I ran forward and stabbed the bodiless head in an effort to look like I was helping. 

"You should go home." She said firmly, more a demand than a request. "Let me deal with Carol" I looked at her, confused.

"What did Rick say?" I asked. "You can't extradite her again"

"Extradition would be giving her up to someone else" she answered, and I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, Michonne, you can't. She needs our help to get better." Michonne shrugged and I turned to the left, following the long spread foot prints of Carol on the run.

"We have children, older people. She can't be trusted" I sighed. What could I say? She'd taken against me and Daryl but it could have easily been Glenn and Maggie, Hershel out here with her rather than Charlie. I sighed shallowly again, the thought of Charlie in danger making me feel anxious. 

"She acted out on her own before, Abra." Michonne looked over at me beside her, "and she'll do it again" as I looked back at her she drew her Katana, eyes widening impossibly large on her face. "Carol!" She yelled, as I heard someone run up behind me.

I had no time to turn but I drew my knife as Carol threw an arm around my neck and pressed the tip of her own knife into my jaw. There was barely any pain, but I felt the trickle of blood as it ran lazily down my neck.  
I held my hands out to Michonne, signalling that she stay back and keep calm. 

"I'm doing this for you" Carol hissed in my ear. "For Daryl, for dear little Charlie" my heart stopped, just like that, and I was sure she was going to slit my throat.

* * *

 

The doc patched me up. A difficult task with Charlie refusin' to be put down. The doc offered to sedate him, but I refused. He'd had 'nuff bein' pulled about for the rest of his days. 

Rick, now strapped up and full of painkillers was on a rampage. 

"She cannot be trusted" he said "she is not coming back here" He was pissed when he found out Abra hadn't come back with us. Told me why he'd sent Michonne.  
"To make sure Carol Doesn't come back" he had spat. It hurt to think Carol would be made to leave again, and the look in Rick's eyes said he wanted to make sure she couldn't return. She'd been a much needed friend in all this, an unspoken bond had grown between us. But now...

I hugged Charlie a little closer

"She's sick," I said, the doc agreein' with me "we can help her" but Rick flatly refused to hear it. "We can't leave her out there to die" I said quietly, for Charlie was still on my arms "that ain't us" Rick had glared at me.

"She's killed before. She isn't one of us." 

"We kill, almost every damn day" I waved my free arm at him, still unable to think Carol meant any real harm to anyone. 

"Not our own!" He yelled, n I couldn't disagree with that. "I'm going out there." He said, headin' for the infirmary door. I looked at Charlie, I looked at Maggie n Denise. I wanted to follow, so much I wanted to follow n check that Abra was ok, n Carol was kept away from Rampagin' Rick until he had calmed down.

"Give him to me" Maggie stood and held out her arms. Hershel was dozing, drip removed. She took Charlie who didn't mutter a single complaint, and looked at me, eyes wide n angry. "I don't want her out there either" she said "If she is sick, perhaps we can help her, but I don't want her in the house no more. Not now. It's gone too far" I nodded at her. It was a fair 'nuff comment. I wanted her safe, n I wanted her well if she really was fixable.

I din't want her anywhere near Charlie. 

I chased Rick out the door n hopped on my bike, pain coursing through my leg, n over takin' him so I could show him where we were last.

 


	13. Chapter 13

 I couldn't think. Charlie and Daryl were all my stupid head would fill with as I stood listening to Carol rant and watched Michonne's horrified face. Sometimes the tip of Carol's knife barely feathered on my skin, others it felt like she'd sliced me open. Tiny narrow streams of blood ran down my neck, pooling on Carol's forearm, now around my chest, holding my shoulders tight. 

 

 "I'm not sick. I know exactly what I'm doing" she said to Michonne, who had offered her help back at home. "You think I can go back there, after what I've done?" 

 "Carol" I said, but she squeezed me

 "You don't speak" she said. "You don't have a say in this" I quieted.  "Once you're out of the picture it will be easier." She continued. "I'll have Charlie, and he'll be brought up right!" Michonne narrowed her eyes.

 "And Daryl?" She asked "you think he'll just let you do this?" Carol laughed harshly next to my ear. The world before my eyes pulsed with the beat of my heart, coming in and out of focus. I'd lost a lot of blood, I'd had a traumatic experience. I was fit for nothing but sleep. My eyelids even began to drift, like my whole body was giving up on me.

"I can work Daryl." Carol was saying, "even better than this one thinks she can" I felt her move behind me, shifting her weight as my legs began to give out. "Stand up!" She yelled, as Michonne whispered

 "Walkers" my eyes popped open, I dug deep and found some ounce of strength. I could hear  them behind me and Carol. Michonne moved past us to get to work on them, and Carol turned us, me still in her arms, and finally pulled her knife from my neck, though she kept hold of me. 

The rotters that got past Michonne advanced on us with alarming speed, and Carol kept me held tight in front of her. I was frightened, vulnerable, and the first in the firing line. 

 "Don't do anything stupid" I said to Carol. Begged really. Two of the assholes had taken notice of her fast movements, and reached for us both. I squeezed my eyes closed, awaiting what I assumed was the inevitable push, Carol heaving me into their path.

Instead I heard her yelling into my ear, a scream of pain and distress. I opened my eyes and a walker had her arm. Had her fucking forearm in its mouth. Blood spurted in the air as it chewed and she gripped around me ever harder. I struggled to just get away, more walkers taking interest in the noise. 

The walker chowing down stopped suddenly as Michonne's sword appeared through its head and it fell the ground. Carol was still screaming like a banshee and wouldn't let me go. I kicked backward into her leg and she finally released her grip a little. I span from her arms and tried to draw my knife, but in a state of shock and fear I couldn't help but fumble, and it felt like it wasn't there, so I did what I could, pushing the walker back away from me and Carol, my hands melting into its ribs before they found purchase. I gagged at the shit and guts all over my hands, but had enough space now to check on Carol. Her arm pulsing blood, her screams trailing off to whimpers 

"I'm bit, I'm bit" I looked up as the walker approached again, refusing to give in, and I grabbed it and yelled at it and pushed it into a broken tree branch.  It was still alive, but it was stuck at least for now. I tore my makeshift bandage from my bicep and sat on Carol, my knees on each of her arms, trying to hold her down. I shoved the clean half of my shirt in her mouth to quiet her, and did my best to tie off her arm at the elbow with the blood encrusted half. Every time I tried to tie a knot the damn thing ripped again, and I couldn't get a tourniquet on her. 

I looked up, exhausted, crying frustrated tears, when I heard the bike. I looked up at the sky, thanking whatever morbid dick of a god there might be, and looked back down at Carol, who was already breaking into a cold sweat. 

"Michonne, I need a hand here" but she was attacking the walkers, doing a damn good job of it too, making it look so easy. 

"Kinda busy" she yelled back, swinging the katana over her head and slicing a walker in two. 

"Abra!" I heard, and Daryl was running toward me.

"Give me your shirt!" I demanded, and he ripped off the sleeve, which I finally got wrapped just above carols elbow. He reached around me and pulled the machete from its strap on my thigh and sliced Carol's arm off below the tourniquet. She yelled, muffled by her gag, before passing out completely.

"Little help" Michonne called, and I got up and headed over, collecting my knife from the floor on the way.

No rest for the wicked, I thought, stabbing a walker through the eye and kicking another in the knee so it fell. I twisted and stabbed that one through the soft area above the spine. I stood straight and another was almost on me, as its mouth opened, bearing a bloody hole of yellow and black teeth, anticipating the taste of my flesh, an arrow appeared through its head. I watched it fall, hearing the birds chirping again. The walkers were done, for now, and I sank to my knees there on the grass.

Rain began to fall, Michonne rested with her hands on her knees, Daryl stood, 'bow at his side, and Carol lay prone on the grass. We all breathed heavily. 

Then Rick came running through the trees.

* * *

 "We're too late" she said, lookin' over where Carol lay. "We took too long to get her arm off." I shook my head, there was still time. Who knew how long it would take the infection to get through the body. Every one was different. 

 "Nah," I said "we'll get her in the car, lock'er in a cell at home, n wait n see" Rick looked around us. 

 "We'll tie her up, strap her down. Are the rest of you ok?" Abra was wipin' her hands in the now wet grass, but she nodded. She din't look ok. She looked like Hell. 

 "As well as can be expected" Michonne said, standin' "we need to get her back" 

 So we lifted Carol into the car, her arm still oozin' round my shirt sleeve, her face wet with sweat, n pale. Rick handcuffed her to the inside'a the door. She din't wake up, as such. 

 Michonne rode in the back with her, just in case. I weren't comfortable with that, but I had to trust 'em, I had to have faith in somethin' in this messed up world. Abra n I watched 'em go. We headed back through the trees to the bike, on its side where I practically threw it before. 

 "Ya really ok?" I asked her as we walked, slow, at her pace. 

 "Oh, I've been better" she said shakily. She shrugged "been worse" she stopped n turned to me, her body streaked with blood, her face lookin' tired n old. "How's Charlie?" I nodded.

 "He'll be ok" I said, n took her arm.

 "We can't even trust the people we love, Daryl. Is that life now? I thought walkers were bad, then strangers turned bad, but this? Carol?" She shook her head, sadly. "I never imagined I'd have a kid, even before all of this, but now I have him and the world is a dark and terrible place. I don't want him to live in fear forever" we began to walk again, n I could see the bike ahead. 

"She's sick, Abra. That ain't all of us. She don't represent mankind" Abra stopped again, pullin' her arm from my hand and stared at me.

"Can you blame her? That could be any of us, after all we've been through. Each of us could just...snap"  but I shook my head again.

"No" I righted the bike n she got on behind me. She slipped her hands around my waist and rested her head against my back. 

"Just take me home, Daryl. Take me to my boy and my bed" 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the end. just the end of this part of the series. Lots more Daryl and Abra to come.

It was so hard to see Carol chained in that cell. Regardless of what she had done, she was Carol. She was the woman who saved us from cannibals and evil people who called themselves wolves.

I'd never forgive what she did to Charlie, what she tried to do to me and Daryl, but I could forgive her a breakdown, it was practically expected that someone would crack eventually.

Truth be told, I never expected it of Carol, maybe I should have. Maybe we all should have been watching each other more closely.

We do now.

Maybe now is too late.

She didn't come around. She never woke up from the faint of pain after her arm was unceremoniously removed by my Machete in another's hands. The Doctor did the deed, and we buried Carol on a bright and sunny afternoon, spring was starting to show it's face.

After all she had done, Daryl still took it very hard. He blamed me, he blamed himself, and then he saw sense and blamed the life we live. He planted a Cherokee Rose, which had to be carefully controlled so it didn't take over the whole cemetery, and on occasion he would bring some cut flowers in to the house, and put them in a vase on the window sill.

He didn't have the words, but my God did he have a heart of gold.

I didn't mind this ritual, as the delicate white flowers were so pretty.

 

Charlie and Hershel got over their trauma, as kids do they sprang back to life as soon as they were able. I worried about the mental scars, but certainly none currently showed.

We began to take Carol's advice, taught Charlie to read, and to speak properly, as well as how to hunt, and make traps.

We taught him the truth about life and death. We realised there was no chance to be a child in this world anymore, and innocence was a concept that just no. Longer. Existed.

Life continued. We were one more short, worse for it in some ways, better in others.

But life continued, as it always does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, not sorry. 
> 
> Thank you for reading.
> 
> Scratch that, I am sorry. Very sorry. I love Carol, it took me a long time to get going again after I killed her. But I can see her slowly going downhill.


End file.
